今天是澳洲的国庆日，下面转发一篇关于澳洲的幽默短文，并附上我的中文翻译。 凭我的经验，很多确实属实，但是有一些可能是虚构的。比如用牙开酒瓶的那个，这边的啤酒都是用手就能轻松拧开的，不用开瓶器。所以就是用牙去咬可能也不会有什么危险。

博君一笑，不要当真

MAAAAAATE!

老兄!

Being Australian is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then traveling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

澳洲人就是开着德国车去到一个爱尔兰人的酒吧要一瓶比利时的啤酒，回家路上买了印度咖喱或者土耳其卷饼，到家之后坐着瑞典人的沙发用日本人的电视看美国人的电视节目。

Oh and…… Only in Australia … can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

哦，还有只有在澳洲，送皮萨到你家比救护车还快。

Only in Australia … do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

只有在澳洲，超市让病人走到最后面去取药，而健康人在入口就可以买到烟。

Only in Australia … do people order double cheeseburgers, large Fries and a DIET coke.

只有在澳洲, 人们会在点双层的芝士汉堡，大的炸薯条的同时，却要了无糖的健怡可乐

Only in Australia … do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

只有在澳洲，银行会前后门大敞，却小气的把柜台上的笔用绳子拴住。

Only in Australia … do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

只有在澳洲，我们把车停在马路边，却把我们的垃圾和廉价的割草机锁在车库里。

Only in Australia … do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have “call waiting” so we won’t miss a call from someone we didn’t want to talk to in the first place.

只有在澳洲，我们使用电话答录机去屏蔽来电，然后使用”来电等待”，这样我们就不会错过一个我们现在不想搭理的人的电话。

Only in Australia … are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.

只有在澳洲，才会在溜冰场前的停车场预留残疾人停车位。

142 Aussies were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

在1999年有142个澳洲佬因忘记取下新衬衫上的别针而被扎伤。

58 Aussies are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

每年有58个澳洲佬因使用锋利的刀子来代替螺丝刀而受伤。

31 Aussies have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

自96年起，已经有31个澳洲佬死于浇圣诞树，却忘了拿下通电的圣诞彩灯。

8 Aussies had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

自96年起，有8个澳洲佬因为在试新毛衣的时候忘了嘴里还叼着烟而严重烧伤。

A massive 543 Aussies were admitted to Emergency in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

过去两年有543个澳洲佬因尝试用牙开瓶而送去急救。

And finally…. In 2000 eight Aussies cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.

最后，在2000年，8个澳洲佬在吐到马桶的时候把头碰骨折。

IF YOU’RE PROUD TO BE AUSTRALIAN SEND THIS ON!
HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY!!!!

澳洲国庆节快乐！


from :http://douzi.org/wp/archives/178
1.26 - 澳洲国庆日 January 26th, 2007